![Cut up strips of paper with the following words on them handwritten in black sharpie marker, on a leopard fabric background: "does being demisexual for you mean you don't [feel] desire for ppl unless you have sexual emotional connection with them?"](https://static.wixstatic.com/media/b8c7c9_b0b0fac6c40e44ce85d37fe026c70a0a~mv2.jpg/v1/fill/w_147,h_147,al_c,q_80,usm_0.66_1.00_0.01,blur_2,enc_auto/b8c7c9_b0b0fac6c40e44ce85d37fe026c70a0a~mv2.jpg)
Hi Everyone, Swetha here!
First, I want to acknowledge there are a lot of us who didn't get the space, strength, and acceptance to engage in questioning our sexuality and settled for accepting labels and categories others had for us. As a society we are better at creating space for LGBTQIAA2S+ folks now, but we are not “there” yet!
Being demisexual can have many personal facets - my answer is rooted in my own journey of shedding labels and giving space for QUESTIONING that I needed to do earlier in my life.
Demisexual for me means there is no desire without connection: A connection beyond materialistic and superficial definitions of “love” and ALSO beyond the volatility of emotions. In simple terms, I have to feel like there is a soul contract, or some kind of familiarity that I can’t quite explain before desire can take hold.
Waiting for the universe to throw me an intimate partner for fun times is frustrating but it’s also a non-negotiable (which is why Demisexuals are on the Asexual spectrum! We will abstain if we don’t feel the gain!). But when the universe does throw one my way - I’m never disappointed 😉
Sending you all good vibes!
-Swetha
// Originally posted on Instagram on January 9th, 2023.