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what does being demi-sexual mean for you?


Cut up strips of paper with the following words on them handwritten in black sharpie marker, on a leopard fabric background: "does being demisexual for you mean you don't [feel] desire for ppl unless you have sexual emotional connection with them?"⁠

Hi Everyone,⁠ Swetha here!⁠

First, I want to acknowledge there are a lot of us who didn't get the space, strength, and acceptance to engage in questioning our sexuality and settled for accepting labels and categories others had for us. As a society we are better at creating space for LGBTQIAA2S+ folks now, but we are not “there” yet! ⁠

Being demisexual can have many personal facets - my answer is rooted in my own journey of shedding labels and giving space for QUESTIONING that I needed to do earlier in my life. ⁠

Demisexual for me means there is no desire without connection: A connection beyond materialistic and superficial definitions of “love” and ALSO beyond the volatility of emotions. In simple terms, I have to feel like there is a soul contract, or some kind of familiarity that I can’t quite explain before desire can take hold.⁠

Waiting for the universe to throw me an intimate partner for fun times is frustrating but it’s also a non-negotiable (which is why Demisexuals are on the Asexual spectrum! We will abstain if we don’t feel the gain!). But when the universe does throw one my way - I’m never disappointed 😉 ⁠

Sending you all good vibes!⁠

-Swetha⁠


// Originally posted on Instagram on January 9th, 2023.

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